Times of testing.....
Been a little while since I last posted. I had a tough road a couple weeks back where trusting in God and what He was doing in my life was hard to take. I purposed in my heart and prayed that God would see me through it all. I then reminded myself constantly that He was in control and I even quoted parts of scripture that I could remember that did deal with the situation I found myself in. I cannot say that the time was easy after prayer and meditating on scripture, not by any means. I am still human and in the flesh, so therefore still struggle with overcoming it.
I can now say that God saw us through and although things are not perfect, I know He can handle it all.
Then this past week I had an event again that went against what my flesh liked. I of course started down the road of a "bad attitude". Shortly after heading that way, I realized my error. Honestly, what was the big deal? I had to do something I did not like because that is what was wanted of me. Who am I to resist? Would God want me acting that way? These questions I can write now, but at the time my only thought was that this attitude is wrong. I need to change it. God is faithful and helped me overcome this time of testing as well. The request was not difficult and did not hinder what I was doing. It was just a selfish fleshly desire to do what I want and not what was asked.
I can tell you this. People do pay attention to you. Even the ones you do not realize are watching your life or even some who you would not even think cared. Someone saw I had posted about having a tough time and asked me about it. Thanks for that. Appreciated the prayers you sent my way. I had a tough day at work and I had a fellow employee mention that I looked like I was having a rough day. Amazing how after a few weeks of really enjoying being alive and saved, you have one small thing come in and upset the flesh and people see it in your "countenance". It really made me think. What am I portraying to others?
Now I know that my kids have friends that say they are "afraid" of me. At first I was like really? why? But now it really has me thinking. What do people see when they look at me? Do they see a man trusting in God to handle his problems? Do they see a man that has something in his life that they need? Am I being a good witness and example for my Lord? I "hate" these thought processes..... mostly because it starts to point things out in my life that need to be worked on. I am but a lump of clay in the potters hands. He will develop me into the man He wants me to be. I can still choose to visibly show His grace in my life and the joy that truly is there or not. "Lord, help me to be the visible witness you would have. Let my light shine before men so that they may see you and come to know you as I do."
People we are still here for a reason. Let God have His way. No direction? Check the Bible. You doing what He already told you too? Guess what, you may be surprised at what He decides to show you when you do check His word.
Here is my example on this. God had been dealing with me for a couple of weeks on one passage of scripture. "Go ye into all the world and preach the gospel..." Now, I am not a great speaker. However I have helped with a Sunday school class before and allowed my fleshly pride to take full pleasure in what "I" was doing. So this scripture bothered me. I wanted to serve in this area if He wanted me too. However, I did not want to do this if it was a fleshly desire to be noticed. We had our watch night service and got to hear some good preaching from men who believe this is the direction God wants them to go. I knew God had been working on me and still I did not join them. The Wednesday pastor asked why I had not taken the opportunity and preached as well? Honestly? I should have and even told pastor so. Now for the "no direction". The mentioned scripture was troubling me still. Sunday school teachers and assistance were needed. I signed up. If God wants me to do this, than He will have it placed on the heart of the leaders to use me where He wants. If not..... then I know He does not want me going in that direction at this time. Trust Him and head in a direction. If He does not want you going that way He will "close the door".
Better end now. If I do this long enough I may end up writing a novel or something......
Laterz.....
I can now say that God saw us through and although things are not perfect, I know He can handle it all.
Then this past week I had an event again that went against what my flesh liked. I of course started down the road of a "bad attitude". Shortly after heading that way, I realized my error. Honestly, what was the big deal? I had to do something I did not like because that is what was wanted of me. Who am I to resist? Would God want me acting that way? These questions I can write now, but at the time my only thought was that this attitude is wrong. I need to change it. God is faithful and helped me overcome this time of testing as well. The request was not difficult and did not hinder what I was doing. It was just a selfish fleshly desire to do what I want and not what was asked.
I can tell you this. People do pay attention to you. Even the ones you do not realize are watching your life or even some who you would not even think cared. Someone saw I had posted about having a tough time and asked me about it. Thanks for that. Appreciated the prayers you sent my way. I had a tough day at work and I had a fellow employee mention that I looked like I was having a rough day. Amazing how after a few weeks of really enjoying being alive and saved, you have one small thing come in and upset the flesh and people see it in your "countenance". It really made me think. What am I portraying to others?
Now I know that my kids have friends that say they are "afraid" of me. At first I was like really? why? But now it really has me thinking. What do people see when they look at me? Do they see a man trusting in God to handle his problems? Do they see a man that has something in his life that they need? Am I being a good witness and example for my Lord? I "hate" these thought processes..... mostly because it starts to point things out in my life that need to be worked on. I am but a lump of clay in the potters hands. He will develop me into the man He wants me to be. I can still choose to visibly show His grace in my life and the joy that truly is there or not. "Lord, help me to be the visible witness you would have. Let my light shine before men so that they may see you and come to know you as I do."
People we are still here for a reason. Let God have His way. No direction? Check the Bible. You doing what He already told you too? Guess what, you may be surprised at what He decides to show you when you do check His word.
Here is my example on this. God had been dealing with me for a couple of weeks on one passage of scripture. "Go ye into all the world and preach the gospel..." Now, I am not a great speaker. However I have helped with a Sunday school class before and allowed my fleshly pride to take full pleasure in what "I" was doing. So this scripture bothered me. I wanted to serve in this area if He wanted me too. However, I did not want to do this if it was a fleshly desire to be noticed. We had our watch night service and got to hear some good preaching from men who believe this is the direction God wants them to go. I knew God had been working on me and still I did not join them. The Wednesday pastor asked why I had not taken the opportunity and preached as well? Honestly? I should have and even told pastor so. Now for the "no direction". The mentioned scripture was troubling me still. Sunday school teachers and assistance were needed. I signed up. If God wants me to do this, than He will have it placed on the heart of the leaders to use me where He wants. If not..... then I know He does not want me going in that direction at this time. Trust Him and head in a direction. If He does not want you going that way He will "close the door".
Better end now. If I do this long enough I may end up writing a novel or something......
Laterz.....
Comments
Post a Comment